Thinking Back and Thinking Forward

I sit in the Honolulu airport in front of the Continental check-in once again. The last memories I have of this place include many nervous and excited student missionaries with lots of luggage. This time, I am alone. I am waiting for Ronald to return from the car rental agency. My mind can almost relive those moments before departing to Saipan. I shared the excitement and anticipation. All of the advertisements for spending a year on an Island were streaming through my mind. Images of adorable students hugging and loving their teachers. There were pictures of perfect white sandy beaches and missionaries that are out for an adventure.

While I sit here and somewhat reflect on my one year as a “missionary” I don’t really compare my experience to that of those images. For me, the drudge of daily life sets in,  waking up early just as I would for any other job. The students were precious, but not more precious than any other children would be. The beaches were beautiful, but for me, they were not any better than Florida or Hawaii. I’m not trying to say that I regret my experience in any way, but I’m realizing that no matter where you are, you need to treat it as a “missionary experience”.

You see, I thought that going to a remote Island would make me a better person, and a better Christian. However, in many ways, I think I regressed. I didn’t spend as much time praying or reading my Bible as I would have liked. I thought that once on an Island, I would HAVE to depend on God for strength. But unfortunately, my proud self took over and life just got “too” busy to do all these things.

As I prepare to go again through airport security and board the plane to my new life, I want to make every moment count. I want to pray more than I did before, and really learn how to be a Christian. I want my marriage to glorify its creator and I want my children to look to God for love, guidance and everything else.

…now, if only Ronald will show up to the airport, we can get on with it! 🙂

3 responses to “Thinking Back and Thinking Forward”

  1. Being a missionary is a funny thing. Sometimes it is a harder place spiritually. I also remember how there were many ordinary days as a missionary.

    Welcome home!


  2. Hey Tiffany:

    You don’t know me but I need your help! I found your blog when typing in “Saipan baby”. I am moving to Saipan in a month and I am pregnant! I need advice on a doctor, places to get baby stuff…anything that would help me enter this a little less blindly!

    Peace and Blessings!


  3. Thanks for the insight…it is good to hear the input of one who has gone out. Don’t forget that you made a difference in the lives of many kids’ lives and they will be eternally grateful. Being a missionary in the states will be a challenge, but don’t let it discourage you. God bless you both! Jason


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